Diary of an Unemployed Graduate – Day 174

For those of you that read this section of my blog on a regular basis, you will know that in a number of my posts that I always say that I don’t get my hopes up when looking for jobs, and that I never hold my breath, for fear of getting myself too excited about a job working out, then having the crashing sense of disappointment when it comes back that I haven’t been successful. I will admit, I didn’t listen to my own advice over the weekend, and right now I am wishing that there was a time machine available, so I could go back to Friday and warn myself to not get my hopes set so high, as then I may not be feeling and thinking the way I am at this very second.

I had an interview for a job last Friday (28th February 2014), a job that I was really, really interested in, and that I thought I would be able to bring a lot to, as well as learning a lot from it. The position was initially a three month journalism internship, but unlike a lot of other internships out there at the moment, this one actually paid, and paid quite well too. There was promise, almost certainty if anything, that at the end of the three months, the intern role would turn into a full time position. All of these factors, combined with the obvious fact that it was in something that I have been working to get into for the past year since leaving university, it all seemed pretty perfect. In all honesty, I thought that the interview had gone well, as well as it could have done, anyway. The people from the company who interviewed me were both extremely nice, and they were giving off vibes that I was telling them what they wanted to hear. After I had answered all of the questions they were required to ask me, and I had asked them anything that I was interested in, I was asked to do a writing and proof reading test. I tried my very best at both, and once the half an hour was up for that, the interview was over and I made my way home. All in all, I was in their offices for around an hour. On saying goodbye to me, they informed me that they would be in contact with me early next week (week commencing 3rd March 2014). So I enjoyed my weekend, waited patiently for Monday to come for hopes that I may hear some news, and good news at that. I saw an old friend whom I went to secondary school with on the Saturday, and then went into town for a coffee (well, juice/hot chocolate for me, not a coffee lover. I digress) with three of my friends, and on both occasions I confided in them about the interview that had taken place on the Friday. I think they all got the impression that I was feeling excited about the job, not just because it had been my first interview in a while, but because I really wanted to be given the opportunity. I will admit, looking back at the conversations I had with my friends over the weekend, maybe I was getting a little bit too over excited, and getting my hopes that bit too high. After just over nine months of being unemployed after finishing education, it’s quite hard to not be excited when you think that you are getting that step closer to finding a job.

Maybe I tempted my own fate by talking too much about the interview and how it went, by not fighting hard enough to control the excitement that steadily built between Monday and today. To make a long story short, and as you might have well guessed by the tone of this post thus far, I didn’t get offered the job. I received an email around two hours ago telling me that I was one of the strongest candidates that they had received an application from, as well as one of the strongest they had interviewed, but unfortunately they had offered the internship to someone else, someone who they thought had more relevant experience in the type of journalism they at their company created. As predicted and mentioned at this beginning of this post, a massive wave of disappointment has just washed over me. This time last week I was feeling positive, more upbeat than I had felt in quite a while. Now, well, it’s like I have had every ounce of positivity swept away from me.

So back to square one. Again. Again. Again. Again. Today has seen a massive set back in the wrong direction, and it hasn’t helped when I have another appointment with the job centre this coming Friday and there are hardly any jobs for me to apply for. All there is currently available is either jobs that are of a higher level than I am at that need a good five years experience or more, or jobs that I have already applied for. Slim pickings for me this week. I will keep powering through though, as always. I will definitely be learning a lesson from these past few days though, to next time not get my hopes up. And next time, I will definitely be listening to my own advice.